i am blessed!

the math bck then was

• 1+1+1+1=4

and

• 4-2=2

but then happens

• 2-1=1+(1)

and now

• (1)+1=1.5

hahaha..i know u don't get this but the math tells it all..

i sat there crying in that holy place feeling so down....

ignored by all the math i mentioned above except the (1)..

left there alone to think..

and then..

drove home and decided to check my money in the bank but the math failed me again when i saw the balance..

then drove home and i decided to go around 1 corner which i don't always pass tru,just to avoid going home too early by 5 mins...

how i was so freaking sad..

arrived home and went out of the car and went to push the gate open but it won't budge because my bro locked it..(it's been a while since the auto gate was broken)..

sadness turned into anger and open the gate by just one push with my angry might...(i usually take a few push to get the gate open wide,it's 1 heavy gate)..u can see how anger can give u the strength sometimes..haha

then,i pulled a long face to my parents and straight went up to my room with sadness+anger in my mind...sigh!

could not bear it...Ya Rasulullah

i threw my purse on the floor and my hps on the bed...

i could not bear it...Ya Rasulullah

switched the comp on and still could not bear it..

the anger started to cool down really fast as i rmmbrd HIM..

n later.. D replied my msg..

i smiled at his 1st reply..

he made me smile again..

after a few msgs,he made me understand...

but i was still very much in a crying mood..

when to the kitchen,as i was feeling really hungry as i took a very early dinner this afternoon..

met mom downstairs in the living room still awake..

took some food and talked with Emak..

All the tears running tru my cheeks as i could not bear it.

After the talk,it made me realised that i have forgotten that I am Blessed!

I have been.Ever since i was in my Emak's womb.When i was a baby i received a gift( for the 1 i knew,maybe there was more..).All tru out childhood,i received thousands of gifts and in my adolescence years i also received a gift and now i should be thankful as i am always been given special gifts and not just by anybody.This person is special.The person is......

haha..it's a secret!i can't tell because it won't be a secret anymore would it?hahahaha....

I just know i am blessed.i should not worry of other ppl.If no one is there when i'm sad,so be it.I know where to turn to.I know i have been neglecting my priorities in life.I am sorry.I know sorry is not good enough .I am going to fulfill my responsibility especially to GOD,parents and myself.

This is just a small matter.In future,i believe there is much more harder and difficult issues i have to overcome.If in this small matter everyone is tired of me,let's just see how the future holds the story.*BE STRONG GIRL,the ride is getting tougher.Hold HIM tied!**

'Jangan buang masa,duit..nak blaja..blaja btul2...',said and always been referred as the important quote.*